12 Ways to Become a BOLD and CONFIDENT Person
Updated: Nov 17, 2019
How to be confident and boost your self esteem.
Are you shy? Struggling with your self confidence? Too passive or just not as bold as you would like to be? Here are 12 ways you can become a stronger, bolder, and more confident person in everything you do.
“The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do it.” — J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
First things first: REDUCE THE STRESS IN YOUR LIFE. Drop out of the clubs and organizations that are dominating your free time. Finally pay to have that leaky roof repaired. Send your crazy destructive dog to obedience training. Bring order to your cluttered home. Cut ties with a drama queen friend. Do whatever it takes to bring calm a hectic life.
Less stress equals a happier you. It's much easier to feel confident when you're happy!
Start the day by listening to high energy music with a positive message. Even sing along or dance around to something fun and cliche like, the theme from Rocky or "We are the Champions" by Queen as you get ready for work, school, a big presentation, etc.
Pay attention to your personal hygiene. No matter your style or personality smelling good, feeling fresh and having good breath at all times can make you more appealing to others and that in and of itself is a great confidence booster.
Stand up straight! Standing tall with your head held high will not only make you appear more confident, but you'll FEEL confident as well. Get into the habit of doing this by walking about your home with good posture. Practicing yoga can also improve your posture and increase your self-awareness and confidence as well.
Learn from your mistakes. Dwelling on what you've done wrong will only bring you down and can cause you to resent yourself. Self resentment is the ultimate confidence killer! No matter what you've done, forgive yourself for being human, change your plan so you don't repeat the same mistake and try, try again.
"Take chances, make mistakes. That's how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave." - Mary Tyler Moore
Get in shape. While losing inches and pounds may make you feel better about your physical appearance, seeing and feeling your endurance and stamina increase is just as good.
At first you could only run a few yards, then you can run a mile and now you're on your way to the Boston Marathon! Also, improving your overall health can and will make you a much happier person and as I mentioned before - it's much easier to feel confident when you're happy.
Practice. Practice good body language and communication skills when you're alone. Stand in the mirror and practice a big bright smile or making eye contact (yes, with yourself!) practice standing up straight, strutting, flirting, small talk - anything you feel you need to improve upon to make yourself more assertive and approachable.
If you lack self-confidence in a certain skill, practice it! Take classes, research or watch online videos to improve your singing, cooking, public speaking, guitar playing, etc.
And remember: don't practice something until you get it right - practice until you can't do it wrong.
Collect inspirational quotes and write fun confidence boosting notes for yourself that say things like "You rock!" or "Hey sexy!" Hang them up in your cubicle, tape them to your dashboard, write them on your mirror in lipstick, have them printed on a coffee mug, memorize them - whatever you want to do to help the words sink in and remind you that you are an awesome person.
Don't be afraid of stares. "I love this neon pink dress but if I go out in it, I will get stared at!" "I shaved my head bald and now everyone is staring at me!"
Um, so? Being stared at isn't as bad as you think.
You're being admired
You're simply being noticed.
What you're most likely worried about is what's going on in people's noggins when their eyes settle on you, but what you need to realize is a person's facial expression while they're eyeballing you might not have anything to do with you at all. You probably caught their attention just as they were thinking about something negative or troubling like, "Ugh, I can't believe my kid got lice again."
Don't worry about what others think about you.
"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Unless you're constantly hearing that everyone thinks you're a rude or hateful person - you don't have much to worry about. If someone expresses that they think you're a Satan worshiping witch because you wear all black everyday then that's THEIR problem. Not yours. (Yes, I have experienced this.)
But seriously if everyone thinks you're a jerk you might want to do a bit of soul searching to find out why and what you need to do to fix that.
Venture out of your comfort zone. Go to a different restaurant. Visit a relative you don't know very well. Go to a crowded party. Confront a bully. The jolting sensation of trying something new that you're not particularly fond of doing is always a good experience no matter how awkward it is and it will also give you the confidence you need to tackle even bigger adventures and tougher problems.
Accept and cherish compliments. I can't stress this enough.
Let positive feedback and high praise stick to you like velcro. Let the words lift you up and coat you like honey. I understand that sometimes receiving compliments and praise can make you feel a little uncomfortable but learning how to simply say "thank you" instead of arguing or questioning the person's sincerity is a confidence building exercise. Check out this great wikiHow article How to Take Compliments.